Sunday, January 13, 2013

7a.m.

It appears that our feisty one has had another good night.  No episodes, no projectile milk spitting, no de-sats.  Just sleeping and hanging out and going up to 5lb 3oz.  Thank you, Jesus.  That makes no episodes since her last epic one on Friday evening...I hate to be a pessimist, but she'd better not be saving a doozy of one until I get there today.  Please Lord, just keep her going like she is, nice and steady.

-Keli


6p.m.

Aubrey and I hung out earlier, around lunch time, and she did beautifully.  My parents went to see her this afternoon, and she did beautifully.  Adam and I got back to the hospital around 4, and Aubrey did beautifully.  I'm trying ever so hard not to get my hopes up, but I could definitely get used to her not turning blue.  When I walked into her room at 4, the nurse said, "I know her oxygen is off.  I turned it off a little while ago, *and she's been doing fine.*"  The words I put between the *s she said in a whisper so Aubrey wouldn't hear her. ;)  She did ok with no oxygen; she was supposed to stay above 92% to be able to stay completely off of it (she's on room air-no extra oxygen-but the cannula gives her a little extra woosh of air pressure), but she hung out around 88 or 90% so she had to have it put back on.  That's ok.  At least that little experiment told us that she's getting to where she needs to be and can hold her own pretty well.  She gave a great big gag and cough at one point, and I was just sure her sats were going to take a nose dive...thankfully she got it all swallowed back down and took a big breath and got on with it. She'll get there.  I know she will. (I'm telling myself that over and over and over...)

My family has always loved to travel, and I've been blessed to be able to see some of the most amazing places and things in our world: the glaciers of Alaska, the volcanoes and beaches of Hawaii, the Grand Canyon, the green fields of Ireland, wild elephants and giraffes in South Africa, the Swiss Alps, the Forum in Rome, the canals of Venice, Michelangelo's "David" in Florence, Stonehenge...Even after seeing all those wonders that were either created by God or created by man using the brain God gave him, I am convinced that our child is the single most stunningly beautiful creation I've ever laid eyes on.  I am absolutely confounded by how perfectly made she is, how lovely, regardless of who she resembles.  She is exquisite. I can sit and stare at her for hours, memorizing the curve or her plump little cheek, the purse of her lips, the upward swish of her eyelashes, the bend of her finger as she curls it around mine.

She is made even more beautiful in my eyes by the fact that she isn't supposed to be here, and I don't just mean that her due date isn't until February 6th.  I mean that, statistically, she isn't supposed to be here--so many 24 weekers don't survive.  This baby has spunk.  She has determination.  She is strong.  And that is beautiful.  Even as terrifying as all this has been, I cannot help but know that God has held this tiny, perfect being in His hand this entire time.  There is no other explanation for her being as healthy as she is and has been.  Beautiful.    

the oxygen was off for a while...still lots of sticky on her nose.

the many expressions of the Feisty One

She's so perfect.

-Keli